In an effort to reach out to more nerds and thus expand their social network, Fat & Depressed Worldwide® has begun Twittering. When asked about the new social technology, the CCO and Regular Logsplitter stated that he initially thought twittering was a euphemism for excessive masturbation.
"I mean, I've diddled fiddles before, but I've never twittered until now."
"It feels pretty good."
Sources close to the Logsplitter have suggested he'll do whatever Oprah says he should do. The F&D WW® Corporate Headquarters has a mandatory "Oprah and Underwear" brainstorming session every afternoon. Employees have touted the luncheon as a way to build a stronger internal agency community.
"It's a lot easier to get close to coworkers when they're wearing nothing but underwear."
What can you expect from the Fat & Depressed Worldwide® twitter feed?
"Well, we plan to talk a lot about ourselves. We want the world to get up close and personal with every mundane detail of our pathetic lives at the agency. It's reassuring to know that when we're alone on the toilet, we're not really alone. Because we're tweeting about it!"
You can follow Fat & Depressed Worldwide® here:
@FatAndDepressed
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