Sweat Up In My Creases.

It's here! "The Official-Unofficial Crowdsourced Minneapolis Jam Of Summer 2011."

The song is about perspiration building up in the folds, pits, and crotch regions of the human body. The sentiment is about coming together, creating something as a community, and behaving like a 12 year old.

A few months back I contributed some lyrics for a crowdsourced rap my good pal Paula was putting together. The crack staff working on the project just finished this hilarious video.

It all started on Facebook, where aspiring MC's would drop their rhymes. The best of the best were featured in the song.

The dude eating the jalapenos is a former student of mine, Matthew Gilman. And that's bud Craig Ferrence looking like a little known and oft-forgotten member of House of Pain.

Here are the lyrics in their entirety with my contribution in bold:

“Sweat Up In My Creases”

—Goin’ 40 in my VDub speed limit 20

Starbuck caramel latte straight up venti

tick-tock goes the clock cop’s got my block on lock

and I’m pittin’ out in my Passat

—Feel my back start stickin’ to the seat

can’t help myself from movin’ to the beat

the more I move, the more I excrete

pits soaked, wet socks on feet

—I got sweat up in my creases

rockin’ bling with all them fleeces

—Children ask me, “Are you workin’ up some hits?”

nope…just comin’ back from a shvitz

you can pay for school but you can’t buy class

you can pay for central air but you still have swass

—I keep peeling off my chair where da back of my knees is

smellin’ like I popped the top off of a Cheez Whiz

cuz I got sweat up in my creases

gangsta lawyer jargon hope the heat “desists and ceases”

—Feel my back start stickin’ to the seat

can’t help myself from movin’ to the beat

the more I move the more I excrete

pits soaked, wet socks on feet

—Got sweat up in my creases

got my kulauts from Maurice’s, yeah

sweet spiral perm from Regis

got sweat up in my creases

—Drip drip drippin’

run run runnin’

down my back

collectin’ in the seat of my underpants

—Fools (ow!) you all wack

I say pleeease, cuz my mama taught me good

but I’m sleeze

cuz my papa was a roller

—Shoppin’ all day, should of wiped better

walkin’ all squishy, t.p.’s vendetta

Summer’s Eve ain’t helpin’ with my bodily releases

Is that a dead hooker I smell…or does your crack carry feces?

—Movin’ on up to George and Weezie’s

Olivia Newton John’s as sweet as Georgia peachies

“She’s like the wind” but I got warmer breezies

Tiger Wood’s inventin’ new S-T-D-sies

—Feel my back start stickin’ to the seat

can’t help myself from movin’ to the beat

the more I move, the more I excrete

pits soaked, wet socks on feet

—I got sweat up in my creases (got sweat up in his creases)

I’m so ill I got diseases, yeah

Bitches please, it never ceases (bitches please)

I got sweat up in my creases

—Got sweat up in my creases

10,000 words on “Being Fly” for my Masta’s Thesis

Got sweat up in my creases

Bringin’ you back with my psychokinesis

Got sweat up in my creases

If it gets any hotter I’ll need an ass prosthesis

Got sweat up in my creases

Right now…America needs this.

(a drip to the drop you don’t stop…so sticky icky)

Here is the entire list of credits for the song and video. Well done people.